how was YOUR Halloween?

The day began with a special message from Mark (yes, that's written in Halloween candy...)

After a very busy day at work (which involved a lovely chocolate cake that I did not get a picture of), I picked up Laura (my sister-in-law who officially became a Spartan this fall) and her boyfriend Mike - they wanted to help us hand out candy (for two VERY cold hours - we had 228 trick-or-treaters at our house. Yes, I'm a dork - I kept track)

Mark, Brooks and I got into full ninja gear (we had to use a special camera because ninjas don't usually resolve on film...)

Some of the boys that live nearby felt threatened by our ninja skills and decided to launch an attack (notice that Brooks is glowing with ninja power... or that's just his reflective running pants...)

All in all - a very fun Halloween. We handed out a TON of candy, still have a bunch leftover - we ate tacos, sat outside until our fingers and toes went numb, and watched an episode of Scrubs. Who could ask for more?

made my day

I had a great weekend with my friend Kristen - I will post a picture or two and more details later... today got away from me a little bit! :)

Today, my day was made by a birthday card I got in campus mail - signed in detail by all the lovely ladies I used to work with in the Department of Political Science. My new job is good - lots of great people and some cool new opportunities... but the growing pains and adjustments are hard. Sometimes I really really miss my old work "home" - and the card in the mail today is making me tear up a little. I sincerely wish I could have taken them all with me when I switched jobs - but "you can't take it with you," "this too shall pass," and all that jazz.

It's good to remember them all fondly, and know they remember me well also. I like that.

what do people need?

We abuse the word "need" in our culture... I need new shoes, I need an iPod, I need more time... I know I get caught swimming around in things I want, things that are really important, and things I actually need.
If anyone's ever taken a Psychology course, this pyramid looks familiar... it's known as Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. I haven't spent a ton of time analyzing the pyramid, or doing any research at all to see if holds true... but from what I do know - it's fairly accurate. The basic premise is that we cannot have certain needs met if our more basic needs are still unmet. For example, it's hard to feel a sense of self-identity and belonging if you're malnourished and homeless. We tend to focus on basic needs first, then our more complicated ones. Makes sense, right?

Today, my basic needs are well met. I have a warm house, lots of food, clothing - all the biological necessities to keep me alive. My safety needs are also well met - my home is safe, I'm in a relationship that's strong and getting stronger, and my town/state/country is not in a state of active warfare or anything. I start to get a little fuzzy once I move past this phase - granted, I have people that love me and groups to which I "belong" - but I think it's been awhile since I felt a true sense of ownership and identity in my extra-curricular activities. A friend told me on Tuesday that we all need to be surrounded by people who enjoy and love us exactly as we are (as well as encourage and push us along to become better) - as I've gotten older, that's gotten harder and harder to do. I've got a fair amount of self-drive when it comes to pushing myself to grow and change... I like that about myself, but it makes it hard to allow anyone to meet me where I'm at.

I'm not sure exactly what I'm thinking right now... I just miss the feeling of having friends that call you just to check in, people that you can hang out with and not have any anxiety or stress about how the time will go, and truly feeling part of a community where you fit well.

(Just FYI - I'm having a good day - I know this post sounds depressing, but it's really more just something that's been rolling around in my brain lately. Plus, it's sunny outside today - and that's FABULOUS!! :D)

do you ever wish life was like a musical?

Sometimes I do... I think it would be fun to bust out into song randomly (assuming, of course, everyone had dazzling vocal stylings with perfect pitch...), dance around when things are going well, and have music always playing in the background to clue people in to what's going on.

My hotel room in Indy had HBO, and I got to watch about 30 minutes of Evita - it came out 10 years ago (my junior year of high school) - and my friends and I were obsessed with it. I saw it at least twice in the theaters, bought the soundtrack, and owned the VHS as soon as I could(nope, not the DVD...). I still pretty much know all the words. It was fun to be transported back in time a little bit - think how much we laughed at each other's dramatic reenactments of Madonna's performance, how much we enjoyed every scene with Antonio Banderas (guys who can sing and dance are pretty hot - plus, guys that are hot are hot... it was a good combination for a 16-year-old theatre junkie).

I watched part of it this weekend after I got back - it was still amazing. I didn't have anyone to swoon with, but I enjoyed it nonetheless. There are scenes and songs that make me want to get up and dance... (and I did, once or twice...) and it definitely makes me wish that life could be like a musical all the time. Fun!

no restraint

One of the ladies in our office has a candy jar on her desk - and right now, it's brimming with caramels - the kind you really only see at Halloween. I'm pretty good at resisting certain things - but I've found myself grabbing one of these almost every time I pass her desk. They'll be the death of me! (probably not, but it's fun to be dramatic).

It's funny to think about the areas of life where I can show restraint, and others where I find it really hard. Most of the time, I feel as though I'm fighting against my natural inclinations - and that's a good thing, because we're sinful, right? But sometimes I wonder if I'm fighting with the way God intentionally made me. (Not to say that He made me to be a caramel-hoarding weirdo or anything...) I just wonder once in awhile if the reason that it's so hard to change things about yourself is because that's the way you're supposed to be. I think God doesn't always want me to be different - just to learn to use the gifts He gave me in a different way. For some reason, that almost seems harder to me...

ever feel like old shoes?

Today, I feel like an old pair of shoes. Worn out, ratty, and kinda useless. Here's the real kicker - I have no idea why!

I got back from Indy on Saturday - late afternoon - and had a fairly relaxing evening with my husband. Went to church yesterday, and basically spent the day hiding out, folding some laundry, watching a movie... nothing stressful at all!

So why, today, do I feel as though I've been run over by a truck? Any quick rejuvenation tips to recharge these lazy batteries of mine? I don't want to be so tired!

time to confer!

Tomorrow I leave for Indianapolis for a conference (NACADA - National ACademic ADvising Association). I know it sounds like a hoot, and you're all completely green with jealousy. You should be. I'm a geek, and I think it sounds like fun. My friend Shannon and I are driving down together, and we'll spend about 3 days in downtown Indy, going to sessions to learn about doing our jobs better, eating at fun restaurants and having a good time together. It'll be a nice break from the day-to-day office routine. But it means I'll be absent from the blogging sphere for awhile... no one may notice, since I've been slacking a little lately.

Had a good weekend, got some relaxing in, which is GREAT and much-needed... but somehow Monday can always make me feel like I didn't have a weekend at all. Yesterday was kinda like that. I'm hoping to rejuvenate a little bit with my travel, and then some down-time this weekend too.

BigfatexcitingthingsKatieislookingforwardto:

-a weekend with my friend Kristen - B&B, spas, no boys! :D (October 27-29)

-a weekend with my little sister - sushi, movies, sparkling grape juice, and being VERY silly (November 3-5)

target DOG!

My first job ever (aside from my free-lance babysitting career) was as a cashier at the Target Greatland in my hometown. I wore lots of red and khaki, called all the customers "guests" and all my fellow employees "team members," and got a whopping 10% discount on my purchases. I won't say that I loved it, but I had a lot of fun, and will always have a soft spot in my heart for Target.

Being part of the Business College means that there are recruiters here all the time, trying to win students over for their corporation. Yesterday, Target was here wooing our students. And I got a free stuffed "Target Dog" out of it! He's wearing a red turtleneck sweater with a "T" on it. I'm pretty much really thrilled about that.

Oh, and FYI (you know you were wondering...) the red bullseye on his eye is painted on for live "performances" and is digitally added to his commercials. Interesting...

I'm gonna make the charts!!

A student I had seen early last week came in for another appointment this morning. This poor gal (I'll call her "T") had had a crazy week - 2 tests, a project/presentation, work, and trying to visit the 200+ company Career Gallery that was on campus (to find internships). Needless to say, T was awfully stressed last week, and I sent her away with chocolate in hand (that makes everything better) - along with some practical assistance, of course.

This morning for our appointment, T was frazzled because she'd done poorly on a test last week, and gotten a very unhelpful response when she approached her instructor for assistance. We spent most of the 30 minute appointment trying to ease a little of the frustration and anxiety T was experiencing. No chocolates were given today - just Kleenex.

Here's how our conversation wrapped up:

T: I'll probably come in and see you again before I decide whether or not to drop this class.
Katie: Sounds great.
T: I may just come in and see you every week. (laughs nervously)
Katie: Not a problem - so far, my appointment schedule has been fairly open. (smiles)
T: You'll start to get real popular soon.
Katie: (heart melts a little)

Everyone who has ever had a job knows that there are days when you just don't feel like it. No matter how much you like what you're doing - sometimes, you catch yourself wishing for something else. Moments like that help to remind me that I really do like my job a lot, and that I'm good at it. And I didn't even do anything spectacular - I provide chocolate, kleenex, information and advice - and I listen to people who need to siphon off some stress.

Thanks, T. Come in as often as you want - it reminds me why I like my job, and why I do what I do.

okay, okay, I admit...

I'm a dork. And sometimes (okay, a lot of the time), dorky little things make me happy.

In the advising office, we have this little bell with a sign that says "Happy with our Service? Ring the Bell!" Most students don't notice it, and if they do, probably don't feel like drawing attention to themselves by ringing it. But today, one of my students left and rang the bell on his way out of the office. Made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

I confess!

I'm having a cranky morning. This past week has been kinda tough, and some of my frustration has (I believe) a legitimate base. However, I'm well aware that it's eating at me in an unhealthy way, and bringing out my not-so-favorite characteristics.

My problem is that when I get upset or frustrated with one area of my life - it tends to seep everywhere. Feeling lonely makes me cranky with Mark - stress at work makes me not want to participate in my other commitments - the house being a mess leaves me feeling upset with everything that is keeping me from being able to spend the time cleaning it up...

I'm not sure why I always react this way. I tend to put myself personally into things - which a lot of the time is really a great thing... but in these situations, it means I don't keep things in perspective very well.

Anyone else know what I mean? Have any tips?

split personality

I'm Feeling: chipper
Background Noise:

I went to an MBTI training on Friday (Myers-Briggs Type Indicator - it's a personality assessment tool). It was fun (to me) - I like those types of things. My problem with Myers-Briggs has been that every time I take it, I have a different personality.

It measures 4 different aspects of personality:
1. Introversion v. Extraversion
2. Sensing v. Intuition
3. Feeling v. Thinking
4. Judging v. Perceiving

I took the assessment again over the weekend, and my results declared me an ENFJ - with strong scores in the "N" and "F" categories, and very slight tendencies toward the "E" and "J" side of life. I think this is fairly accurate, although I'm inclined to believe I'm actually an introvert who likes to talk and interact with a couple people at a time. True extraverts like big crowds and new people - those things tend to drain my energy a bit.

At any rate - it was fun to "discover" my personality this morning when my results came back - and it appears that if ENFJ is indeed my true personality type, that I'm in the right line of work. Way to be.

rain, rain...

I like rain - but I mostly like thunderstorms and big, dramatic shows of nature's (God's) awesome power. Just gloomy, dreary rain isn't so much. Especially when roughly 75% of the past 2 weeks has been like that...

The cool thing is that the leaves are starting to turn - and since I also really like autumn, that makes me happy. I like crunchy leaves, chilly air, apple cider, pumpkins, and all kinds of other fun outdoor-fall type things. But it has to NOT be raining in order to enjoy. *sigh*

Had a nice, relaxing, semi-lazy weekend (I was productive in ways that make me relax, which helps me feel like I was lazy - it's a nice pattern, actually). Laundry, crocheting (yes, I'm basically a grandma), watching Friends DVDs, breakfast with a friend, church, bible study with my 8th grade friends. It was good.

Now it just has to stop raining.

yum!

I'm Feeling: hungry for chocolates...
Background Noise: When I Sing by ISH

So it looks like my family will be traveling to Michigan for Thanksgiving this year (not the actual day, but for the latter part of the weekend...) I have two responses to this scenario (which I readily agreed to):

1. Fun/Hooray - Mark and I, for the first time since we were married, won't have to drive to Chicago at any point over the holiday weekend. I've been making the trip since 1998... it'll be good to stay put for a long weekend.

2. Yikes!/Boo - I'm going to go crazy trying to get the house clean/ready to a standard that will impress/appease my mother. Our house is reasonably tidy most of the time - but Mark and I can be cluttery people, and I don't find cleaning baseboards as a useful way to spend my time.

Mostly, I think it will be a good thing. I mean it really might be. Or... I'm praying hard that it will be.

Cooler news - my little sis may come for a visit before then, which is always superspecial fun. I like when she's here. We don't get to hang out and be stupid nearly often enough.

i wanna be a...

photographer. I'm hoping to take a photography class through LCC next semester and learn a little more about the technical side (rather than just pointing my camera at something that looks pretty and pushing a button...)

I always catch myself driving or walking somewhere and thinking "I wish I had my camera." It happened to me on my way to church Sunday morning - I actually called Mark and asked him to bring the camera with him when he came (I was going earlier than him) so that I could get a picture on my way home. I actually took about 10 pictures total! I'm proud of myself... it can get exhausting to always talk about the things you wish you could do, or would do if you had time. I just wanted to suck it up and actually do it - rather than talk about it. And I did.

Got to relax this weekend, which was fabulous, and I have a busy week coming up, but I think it'll be really fun. That's what I'm going to expect, at least. :)

long-winded re-cap

I'm Feeling: upbeat
Background Noise: hummy computer noises

I got a subtle hint that I may be neglecting my blog - so here goes with an update on me...
Mark has been out of town since Monday morning, and he'll be back late tonight - everyone asks how I'm doing while he's gone, so I thought I'd tell you!

Monday was our first WyldLife event of the school year - we had about 40 kids show up (which is great!) and we had a lot of fun. I was in charge of the talk, and I think it went really well.
Tuesday I went to the 8th grade girls' basketball game (they beat Eaton Rapids), ate a steak dinner with Brooks (our new roommate for the year), went for a run with Lauren (which ended with my cruddy running shoes making my left knee HURT for a day and a half) and then went to our in-depth Bible study at 9:00pm (to return home at 11:40).
Wednesday - I had coffee with Meredith, went to a student organization meeting (I'm the advisor for the group), had dinner with Chelsie, then went home and watched Friends with Brooks.
Last night I went to the credit union to get a check cut in Canadian dollars (Kristen and I are going to a B & B in Ontario for a weekend in October and they don't take credit cards... sigh), then headed to Main Dish Kitchen (my new favorite thing) to make some dinners for the next month. Brooks and I ate a fabulous Taco Bell dinner together, then I went to Beaner's with Cheryl. Home by 9:00, watched more Friends with Brooks, then bed.

(Gosh, when I read back through that, I sound like Ms. Social... it's deceiving... :) )
It's been a busy week, but really really fun. I'm looking forward to being home this weekend, sleeping in, and seeing my husband again!

rough road

I'm Feeling: a little emotionally beat up
Background Noise: Shout by Tears for Fears

Every day in my job, people come to me with questions, concerns, problems, and issues to sort out. I try to listen, analyze, ask questions, and help point them in a direction that will shed some light on their lives. This entails making an effort to be approachable, ready to listen, friendly, and encouraging. Those are great things to try to be - but sometimes it really takes it out of me. I really like my job, and most days, I think I'm reasonably good at it. But I can start to feel a little frayed - the surface still looks OK, but underneath, I'm not holding together as well.

I've been feeling a little unsettled lately - like something is missing. I think I know what it is, but I don't know how to get it. Unfortunately for him, Mark winds up bearing the brunt of my emotional instability. Fortunately for me, he loves me a lot and does his very best to show that to me. However, our God created us for community, and no one person can meet all your needs.

I don't really have a question to ask, or a story to tell here. Just pray for me - for His grace and peace, for love and belonging, and for a place in my life to call mine.

slow day?

I'm Feeling: pretty durn good
Background Noise: office-y chatter

I think I might have a slower day in the office today (now I've jinxed it for sure...) Only 4 appointments with students scheduled, and no other outside meetings - yesterday I pretty much went back to back all day. It was fun, but a little tiring. The highlight of my day yesterday was visiting the middle school for lunch. School started in MI last week, and I've been missing my 8th grade friends (I can't believe they're in 8th grade already!!) They're hilarious and friendly and honest and good at making people feel loved. It's a great break in the middle of a work day.

Got a big weekend coming up - YoungLife meeting on Friday, which we are providing dinner for; then we drive to Chicago late Friday night to visit with my extended family on Saturday (got a cousin getting married next month, so it's wedding shower time!), then back on Sunday in time to go to a WyldLife junior leader training from 6:00-8:30. Phew! When I was a kid, I used to think weekends were for relaxing and catching up on things... now, I know better!

alive and well

I don't have much to post about today... but I wanted my few but faithful readers to know that I'm still alive and kicking. :)

Right now, my belly kind of hurts. I think it's because I ate too much too late last night. I don't get heartburn (knock on wood) but I always wake up feeling weird the next day when I do that. Not sure why I do it. I know I won't feel good when it's all over.

Why do we do things like that - that we know will make us feel weird or uncomfortable? I think humans can be pretty stupid sometimes...

cocktails and dreams

I'm Feeling: thoughtful
Background Noise: nothing really

Yesterday, I left my house at 7am and returned at 7pm. Work sure can take up a lot of your time. :)

However, I did have the distinct pleasure of hanging out with Mark last night - we ate dinner, walked around Burchfield Park for awhile, then came home and watched (a classic) - Cocktail. It was a good evening.

Lots of things have been rolling around in my mind lately - mostly about the kind of person I am, the kind of person I want to be, the kind of person God wants me to be (hopefully those last 2 are pretty much the same) - and how I get there. I like improvement, I like conquering myself, I like saying "I'm going to be better about that" and actually following through. But it's hard. Really, really hard.

Hi-Ho!

I'm Feeling: effective
Background Noise: none (I've gotten BAD about turning on my iTunes at my new job...)

First - guess who is the grand marshal of MSU's Homecoming Parade? That's right - Kermit the Frog!! Click on the link for some fabulously obvious jokes about his school spirit. (Secretly, I think it's awesome. Makes me want to go to the parade, and I never go to the parade. Someone was thinking!)

Welcome back from Labor Day! Happy First Day of School!

New York City was fun - except that all the tennis we were scheduled to see got rained out by hurricane Ernesto (the funniest name for a hurricane I've heard in a long time). Big ole bummer, but it was fun to hang with the fam, walk around Times Square, and visit fancy jazzy barbecue places. Thanks to my mom and pop for making that trip possible! (funny note: when I was typing that last sentence, it came out "mom and poop" - whoops!) Got home on Sunday, and had a really nice end to the weekend - saw a movie with Courtney, went to dinner with Kelsey, organized the pantry, did some laundry, and got to spend some time with my hubby.

What did you do?

look out, New York!

I'm Feeling: soooo stinking tired!
Background Noise: co-workers calling "good morning"

So tomorrow, bright and early, Mark and I head to Detroit to catch a plane to go to New York City to watch the US OPEN!! (I used the word "to"5 times in one sentence... sweet.)

My mom, dad, sister, brother, and sister-in-law will all head there sometime today, and we'll catch up with them tomorrow morning. We get to watch fabulous tennis, stay in Manhattan, eat really expensive food, and celebrate my brother's and sister's birthdays. Hooray!!

I'm really excited to go, although I haven't thought about it as much as you'd expect - the crazy new job is keeping me very pre-occupied lately. In a good way, I guess, but I'll be happy to spend a weekend with my family and focusing on something VERY different from work.

So, I wish you an early Happy Labor Day Weekend - spend some time enjoying your company, and make sure you relax a little bit!!

reinforcement

I'm Feeling: encouraged (and also a little sleepy)
Background Noise: a very busy office

I've been doing some work-related research - looking at career options for business majors, trying to figure out what information I need to best help students... and I stumbled across the Keirsey Temperament Sorter - which is a personality test based on the Myers-Briggs typology. I'm a sucker for personality tests - and I have a kind of unusual personality, in that I'm almost 50/50 in a lot of areas - I can be really introverted and also very social, I'm very logical and process oriented but also highly empathetic... it's weird. So it's fun to retake tests, because on any given day, I'll end up "sorted" into a completely different personality than the day before.

However - today, I'm feeling good about myself because of what I saw when I finished my test:
Idealists, as a temperament, are passionately concerned with personal growth and development. Idealists strive to discover who they are and how they can become their best possible self -- always this quest for self-knowledge and self-improvement drives their imagination. And they want to help others make the journey. Idealists are naturally drawn to working with people, and whether in education or counseling, in social services or personnel work, in journalism or the ministry, they are gifted at helping others find their way in life, often inspiring them to grow as individuals and to fulfill their potentials.

Weird - it sounds like my job!! It's kinda cool to think that I'm well-matched for my professional life - it's encouraging when you feel ineffective or intimidated. The gifts God entrusted to me are being used - and that's comforting.

What personality are you?

time flies

I'm Feeling: mildly irked that pictures won't upload into Blogger today
Background Noise: Feels Like Rain by Josh Schicker

Time is zipping right by lately - the school year was ending before I knew it, suddenly it was the 4th of July, then August and back-to-school rolled around... now, with the new job, things are moving at hyper-warp-speed like never before. In some ways, it's really good = time at work goes very quickly (translation: I'm NOT bored). In some ways, it's kind of a bummer = laundry didn't quite get done this weekend, and I keep playing phone tag with people.

Anyway - I'm liking the new job, although it's been crazy and busy lately - I think it will fit me well and the people seem great (we just need to have the time to actually talk to each other once in awhile).

I had lunch with Julie and Courtney on Friday, and lunch with Jane and Jen today - it's good to sit with people who know you and simply laugh about silly things. Very little pressure or expectation... and once again - the time flies right by!!

ghetto thugs?

I'm Feeling: worn out
Background Noise: I Take My Chances by Mary Chapin Carpenter

These are my ghetto-thug girlfriends from WyldLife (translation: funny white girls from Mason pretending to be tough at camp). It's a fun picture.

I've become one of those people who only knows how to post about work. I'm gonna try to not mention it today.

Had a big weekend: spent time up at TimberWolf Lake (our home away from home), had a big picnic dinner with our Mason WyldLife and YoungLife friends, and last night had a back-to-school type meeting with some leaders for YoungLife. It's good to be back into the swing of the school year, but I'm having some of those "Oh my, my calendar is SO FULL" moments lately. It'll all work out, this too shall pass... but for right now, I'm feeling kinda buried in things.

Probably running some errands tonight - and I think tomorrow evening, I actually get to hang out with my husband, who I haven't been alone with in over a week, I think. That'll be nice.

who? what? huh??

I'm Feeling: overwhelmed
Background Noise: hustle-y bustle-y office sounds

I'm betting that my blogging will fall off here for awhile - this new job thing is busier than I remember... I didn't take a lunch hour today, and I haven't stopped "going" since I walked in at 7:50 this morning. Phew!

So far, it's excellent - I really like the people and the work (I think - doesn't feel like I've been working much... just showing up at work), and it's good to be busy with things I'm good at and enjoy. I'm trying to not be my usual self and look too far into the future and get all stressed out. Stay calm, Kate... calm. :)

I'll try to not slip too far behind - I know there are one or two people who check my blog... don't want to disappoint the faithful followers.

Love!

what - no pictures??

I'm Feeling: perplexed
Background Noise: True by Ryan Cabrera

So I can't get my computer to upload pictures... going to have to tackle that one next week, methinks.

New Job Observations:
1. I'm in that weird busy-but-not-busy mode you hit in a new position - lots to learn, but not much to DO yet, since you don't really know HOW to do anything.
2. People are very friendly - I'm learning who likes to pretend to be cranky, and who actually IS cranky (just kidding - so far, I think it's just pretending)
3. My office needs a little personalizing, but I really like it.
4. My feet hurt (I'm wearing real work shoes, instead of my usual summertime flip-flops... gotta make a good impression).
5. I'm excited about all the new things I'll get to do - I think I'll be a lot busier here than in PoliSci - which is good (but I'm nervous that I may have gotten lazy...)

Big weekend - pretty much as soon as I get home from work, we turn around and head to TimberWolf Lake - a place I love - to spend the weekend serving for a family-reunion event there. It should be awesome - I just hope that I can turn off work-brain and enjoy the moments.

Have a great weekend - what are you up to??

quick like a cat

It's been a whirlwind couple of days - I'm at my new desk, in my new office, at my new job. Very cool. I'll try to post tomorrow, then I'm gone for a long weekend - an excellent distraction from the professional - hullaballoo (is there such a thing?) I've been going through the past couple weeks.

Adios!!

bugs and chairs.

I'm Feeling: whelmed (not over or under... just whelmed)
Background Noise: gentle hum of a moderately functional AC unit

Tomorrow is my last day in the Department of Political Science - and I finally got a new desk chair. No, it's not quite like the one in the picture - but it's pretty, it reclines, rolls smoothly, and the fabric hasn't worn out anywhere yet. I'd be bummed, except that it makes a semi-obnoxious squeaky sound whenever you move. So that makes me feel better about leaving it behind... isn't that awfully grown-up and mature of me?

In other news, I have four mosquito bites on my ankles that are driving me absolutely bonkers.

mmmm...

I'm Feeling: full of tasty lunch
Background Noise: She by Elvis Costello

One of my favorite little places to eat in East Lansing is Flat's Grill. They are the home of the "flat sandwich" - which really means that you've got all kinds of sandwiches offered quesadilla-style - tortilla folded in half, with lots of yummy cheese. I just had lunch there - my sandwich, plus chips & salsa and cornbread, and I'm a very happy girl. It's one of those local places that's distinctly East Lansing - gotta love the home-grown goods.

Hooray for Fridays, also... although I'm not quite sure what I'll do with myself tonight. Mark is going to Detroit to a Lions game with his dad and brother. Brooks (our housemate for the year) is on vacation. The night is mine... I just have to decide what to do with it. Any suggestions?

when you're not strong...

This is what we did on the ride home from camp.

It was amazing. :D

healthy eating

I'm Feeling: like curling up with a good book
Background Noise: Down in the River to Pray by Alison Krauss

Last night, Mark and I went to our friend Jacob's 14th birthday party. He has a beautiful, huge, in-ground pool with a diving board, a chocolate lab named Max, a pet turtle named Alabama (Big Al), and there were Cheetos, burgers, hot dogs and ice cream sundaes.

I must say - the delights of birthday parties do not diminish with age. I had a blast playing in the pool with my teenage friends, and I ate a burger, a hot dog AND my whole sundae (on which I put every available topping, including 2 cherries). I even got a treat bag to take home with me. It was a fabulous way to spend Tuesday night, especially with all the things going on with work these days.

don't leave, all the plants will die!!

I'm Feeling: a little emotionally worn out about leave-ing (get it? LEAVES... I know, I'm reaching...)
Background Noise: It Doesn't Matter Anymore by Eva Cassidy

I've embarked upon the journey (entirely new to me) of quitting a full-time, professional position. It is so much harder than I thought it would be. Of course, it's big news, so everyone wants to talk about it. Some people are excited for me, some are disappointed that I'm leaving, some are hard to read, some are stand-offish. Mostly, it's nice that people care - but I never really realized how hard it would be to leave a job I've worked hard at, co-workers I've come to respect and care about, and students I've gotten to know and enjoy over the past two years.

Enough brooding. Suzanne put this in her blog, and I thought it would make a nice distraction for me.

The first player of this game starts with "5 weird things/habits about yourself". In the end you need to choose 5 people to be tagged and list their names. The people who get tagged need to write a blog about their 5 weird things/habits, as well as state this rule clearly, then tag 5 more victims. Don't forget to leave your victim a comment that says "you're tagged!" in their comments and tell them to read your blog.

1. I separate all my silverware in the dishwasher. This makes putting them away SO much easier, it's not even funny. And, I have to have them all pointed up - except for sharp knives, obviously.

2. I don't care which way the toilet paper comes off the roll - I've realized human beings CAN adapt to either setting.

3. I (like Suzanne) make spreadsheets for fun. If I get a chance to use a couple of formulas and do some color-coding... even better.

4. I love to be organized, but when things get out of hand, I tend to like to cover them up and ignore them. Clean folded laundry that needs to be put away will stack up... the dishwasher will remain full of clean dishes, my flower beds become overgrown with weeds the size of a small child... It's not a great strategy, I'll admit.

5. I've become one of those people who won't leave the house without mascara on. I don't wear much makeup, but I've convinced myself I look like Frankenstein if my hair isn't washed and my eyelashes aren't coated with some sort of colored goo.  

my life is good

I'm Feeling: blessed, nauseated, calm, nervous and eager all at once (it's busy over here!)
Background Noise: none because my computer is being cranky

What an amazing week!! I got to spend 5 days with 14 absolutely hilarious, sweet, silly, and genuine middle school girls (some pictured on the left) at camp - we got wet and messy, stayed up til 2:30am braiding each other's hair, laughed a lot, went tubing, mountain biking, rock climbing, conquered the ropes course, screamed and sang and prayed and learned about Jesus. You can't ask for a better time. I could blog for weeks telling you silly stories - so if you want to hear some, just ask.

Also - Monday, right before we left for camp, I was offered a new position - working for the College of Business at MSU - and I accepted!! I'll be advising, teaching a freshman seminar on leadership, and helping to coordinate the C o B's new residential program for freshman. I'm super excited about the new job, and simultaneously feeling like puking because of quitting my current job and all the weird, random loose ends I have to tie up here. It's a really, really good move for me, but it's still hard to leave my current position. I pray that the next few weeks pass by quickly.

The job thing helps with my roller-coaster emotions - that was one of the big things that was up in the air that I couldn't control. Camp is always fabulous, because you get to forget about regular life for a week and just laugh and eat and praise God. Thanks for all your faithful prayers - hopefully I have lots of good stories to post soon!!

whirlwind, anyone?

I'm Feeling: the calm before the proverbial storm!
Background Noise: I Heard It Through the Grapevine by Marvin Gaye

Busy week/weekend - here is a quick run-down:
Thursday:
Cedar Point! We dodged the rain almost the entire time (thanks, God!) and rode the Raptor twice, the Magnum, the Millenium Force twice, a couple of really wet water rides, the Gemini, the Twister, Distaster Transport twice, and Top Thrill Dragster (pictured). I have never screamed in such genuine fear as I did on that ride. It was fun, but it's more than mildly terrifying to go from 0 to 120 mph in 4 seconds, and be shot up 400 feet in the air, only to plummet back down. The plummeting is my favorite part, by far.

Friday:
Job interview (no news yet, I'll keep you posted)
Sleepover with 5 middle school friends - Nat, Courtney, Huntar, Maria and Christy. We had chocolate fondue, set up a bracket for Connect Four (look out - we know how to party!) and ate cookie dough while watching Harry Potter. My life is pretty good.

Saturday:
Cleaned up from the tornado that swept my house the night before
Dinner and church with Chris and Mark
Dairy Hill for ice cream (yum!)
watched a movie

Sunday:
spent our life savings at Meijer (we should buy stock)
planted flowers/plants and pulled weeds
cleaned the house so as to impress our new friends Dan and Suzanne
had dinner with Dan and Suzanne - again, lots of fun, laughing, getting to know each other a little better. They're fun, and their kid is fun. What else could you ask for?

Today:
Catching up on emails/voicemails, seeing some students before I leave for...

Tomorrow:
WyldLife camp at TimberWolf Lake! Seriously fun - but I need to pack and get my act together before tomorrow morning!!

confessions of a mid-twenties wacko

I'm Feeling: like a hungry monster lives in my belly
Background Noise: Beautiful by Bethany Dillon

I have a confession to make. (sidenote: blogging is really good for stuff like this - it doesn't seem like you're talking to anyone, so you can say whatever you like, but at the same time, you know you're spilling your guts about necessary things. Sidenote finished).

My confession: I've been really emotional/mood-swingy lately. Not a clue why. Everyone's first response: "Are you pregnant?" Nope. Second response: "Are you PMS-ing?" Not for two weeks straight, unless my body is reacting to some sort of radiation that has exposed me to unheard-of hormone levels. Third response: "Are you exercising regularly?" Not exactly, but then, I never really have, so there's no reason why my body should suddenly decide to freak out about it.

I'm a person who likes being busy, I like having lots of things to do... but I also like to have some measure of control over those things. Right now in my life - there are a few things that seem so far beyond my control - things that need to be decided, things that need to change, things that I've been dealing with for a long time that don't ever seem to resolve themselves... I've psycho-analyzed myself and decided that this combination is why I've become an emotional pod-person.

In summary - please offer up some prayers for me - I need peace, I need to turn things over to God's sovereign hands, and I need patience as some things will only work themselves out with time. And Mark needs prayer too, because he has to live with me through all this.

If we hang out in the near future, and I (out-of-the-blue) get all weird and teary-eyed and quiet... just wait a few minutes, try to make me laugh, and know that it has nothing to do with you.

(p.s. the picture is of an ancient confessional - where you pour out your guts to the priest... not some scary haunted jail or something, which is what I think it kinda looks like...)

soup and interviews

I'm Feeling: so full
Background Noise: hallway chatter + James Taylor's crooning

We always go to Olive Garden when our friends at work have birthdays - so Jane, Jen, Kay and I went out to eat today for Kay's birthday (which is next week, but schedules demanded an early celebration). Delicious. It's also a really funny group of people - I'm the youngest by about 18 years, and Kay is a techie, Jen works in Career Services, and Jane and I are both more student affairs-y people. But mostly, we all laugh a lot at stupid things and have a good time.

I have a job interview on Friday - still at MSU, just working in a different department doing slightly different things. Job interviews stink - and I'm not sure if knowing that people are "talking me up" prior to the interview makes me feel better or worse. Is it better to keep expectations low or to have their opinion already be formed that you're amazing so that it doesn't matter what you say? At any rate - pray for Friday!! Updates are forthcoming.

I need a break from work, I think. Good thing we're going to Cedar Point this week and camp next week, otherwise I might lose my mind.

conjunctiva = kangaroo?

I'm Feeling: chipper
Background Noise: The Rain in Bombay by Caedmon's Call

Okay... so this morning was the last official morning of freshman AOP (academic orientation program, for those not up on MSU's acronyms) for the summer. Hooray indeed. I love AOP, but this week has been exhausting, for some reason. A couple of students this morning almost made me twitch... so I was looking for some kind of interesting picture to post today, and I typed "eye twitch" into Google - and this came up. I had no idea that any part of my body could be compared to the pouch on a kangaroo, let alone my conjunctiva.

I had a stellar night last night - I completed my first original watercolor painting (as an adult), had cheeseburgers with the Grangers, spent time with Jay the Cowboy, and had coffee with my new friend Cheryl. Cheryl and her husband Dale have lived in Mason for 14 years, they have a farm with pigs and lambs and cats and dogs, and they have 3 kids - 2 in college, 1 at Mason High School. They're awesome - I had a really good time with Cheryl last night. Hopefully there will be a second date.

I'm saying that a lot lately. Maybe too much for a married lady. Good thing Mark is not the jealous type.

nerds and insults

I'm Feeling: cerebral
Background Noise: Fear by Sarah McLachlan


So I found a link to a quiz online that will tell you how "nerdy" you are. I think that the very fact that I clicked on the link makes me a nerd. And the fact that I by no means need a computer program to tell me I'm a nerd. I scored in the 76th percentile - meaning I'm nerdier than 76% of the people out there. Does it make me nerdier that I like being nerdy - or does that make me cool because I'm OK with myself... ??

Moving on... we had dinner with Dan and Suzanne last night - Mark managed to tell them that the way they met and started dating was lame, and I think I left half of my dinner in their fondue pot. And it was a blast - great food, really cool kid to hang out with, and we laughed an awful lot together. Which is cool, because hanging out with new people for the first time is always a little nerve-wracking. I think there will be a second date though... we'll have to think about how we can possibly offend them next time... :)

i heart ribs!

I'm Feeling: anticipatory
Background Noise: This Charming Man by DeathCab for Cutie

I had the most delicious barbecued ribs EVER this weekend, courtesy of my brother's not-so-secret love affair with grilling. Seriously - they were amazing. And I think every one of us who ate them fell asleep for at least 5 minutes within an hour of our meal. We were all so sleepy-content-full.

I have a feeling this is going to be one of those weeks where you're busier than you think you are... I have some big stuff to plan, people to see, work to do - hopefully it all goes smoothly. Just gotta keep perspective - big picture over details. My problem is - I like details. I like little things that make all the difference. However, I think detail-lovers also tend to be stressed out. I'd rather not be stressed out this week.

It's supposed to be 92 degrees today. Hooray for sweating when you're not even moving!

sweeping the clouds away...

I'm Feeling: useful
Background Noise: If This Is Love by Deana Carter

On Tuesday, the FedEx delivery lady stopped by my office, which is unusual. Even more unusual, she left me the box that was sent from FTD.com - which means that it was full of flowers. In two years of working here - not once have flowers come to my office.

I find these lovely yellow flowers inside, with a fun green vase, and a note from an MSU student whom I've never met, but been in contact with via email for the past 9 months or so, helping her sort out her various graduation issues and anxieties.

They make a very sunny addition to my office, and it's always nice to get a token of appreciation from the students I work with.

In other news, I got to take an unexpected road trip last night. Mark called (he's camping in Irons, MI with his HOSA state officers this week) and asked if I could meet him in Clare (halfway to Irons, about 90 minutes from Mason) to bring him an extra set of car keys, as his are now somewhere at the bottom of the Pine River. So I spent three hours on 127 last night in my un-air-conditioned car... luckily, I had nothing else planned for the evening (except bury my nose in my new book that I'm addicted to...) And this way, my husband is able to drive himself home today. I like him enough to not want him stranded in Irons, MI indefinitely.

still kickin'

I'm Feeling: out of the loop - it's been too long!!
Background Noise: Why Walk When You Can Fly by Mary Chapin Carpenter

Here's what's happened in the last 7 days since I posted:
Worked on Thursday (Hooray for AOP) and Friday morning
Friday afternoon: Destination: Uncle Tom's Cabin
All weekend: eating, waterskiing, roasting marshmallows, hanging out with Mark's family, trying to not let the sun get me again (unsuccessful - my nose on Sunday would have put Rudolph to shame)
Monday: more AOP, then home to clean up a little and watch a North Country (in the picture)

I like movies a lot, and I try to rent one or two when Mark goes out of town (as he is now, and will be next week) - it gives me something fun to do while he's gone, and I can rent movies that he wouldn't normally be crazy about watching.

North Country is about the class-action sexual harrassment lawsuit brough by the women working in the mines in Northern Minnesota in the late 1980s. I thought it was really well-done... It's definitely not an "enjoyable" movie, but it kept me watching the whole time. That's $3.50 well spent. 

"Take THAT," says the sun...

I'm Feeling: a little warmer and sorer than usual...
Background Noise: You Call It Madness by Nat King Cole

This weekend, the mighty sun scoffed at my SPF 45 sunscreen and gave me a lovely pink hue... it's not a bad sunburn, but it's making me minorly uncomfortable right now.

Despite my minor skin afflictions - I had a great weekend - Mark and I were in Traverse City for 2 days, celebrating our anniversary (tomorrow = 4 years of marriage!) - we ate great food, met some new people, chatted with old friends, and watched the Blue Angels twice - with some of the best seats in the "house!"

Then we went to Uncle Tom's Cabin (yes, Mark's uncle Tom has a cabin near Midland) and we ate more, waterskied, went tubing, helped around the house a little, ate marshmallows around the campfire, watched fireworks from out on the lake, and generally had a great time.

We got home last night and went to watch Mason's fireworks with our neighbors - which was really fun except for the part where a rogue firework nearly killed people sitting around waiting for the show to start. It's crazy that people were lighting things like that off in such a big crowd. Luckily, it didn't appear that anyone was hurt seriously at all. Just mad and scared - understandably.

How was your holiday weekend??

no place like it

I'm Feeling: chilly - the temp has dropped 12 degrees in the past hour...
Background Noise: Welcome Home by Shaun Groves

This is our house. We've lived there for over 2 years now, and I absolutely love it.
What do you think makes people feel at home? I've been thinking about how different people and places can make me feel more or less "at home." Sometimes I feel less at home because the person or place is new - but sometimes I meet someone and feel instantly connected. Or I walk into a new place and am immediately peaceful.

Sometimes I am less at home because of a known or obvious point of contention... when you feel judged, or know that you think differently about things than the people around you... being misunderstood definitely draws away from that "homey" feeling...

I've been thinking about this since I came back from my "home - home" this weekend - i.e. my parents' house, where I grew up. I am comfortable when I walk in, and I know the house well... but there are moments when I distinctly think to myself, "this is not my real life." It's not my home anymore.

What/where/who is your home? What makes it home?

pigs, relatives & other worlds

I'm Feeling: even-keel (sp?)
Background Noise: My Girl by The Temptations

So that's our friend Cory, pretending to eat the pig that was de-boned and roasted in his backyard. Mostly, the picture just looks mildly psychotic - check out his eyes!! :) But, all creepy-ness aside, the pig was dee-licious, and Cory's really not crazy.

I had a big weekend - battled traffic on the way home to Chicagoland on Friday, hung out with the parents and my sister - then went to visit all 3 grandparents. Here's a brief update:

My dad's mom is in a nursing home (independent care for now) because of Alzheimer's. She's pretty darn lucid still, but definitely shrinking. The top of her head came up to my ribcage.

My mom's mom is never going to die, I think. She's tough, loves to talk, and knocks the breath out of you when she hugs you. Also shrinking, though.

My mom's dad had a stroke almost 3 years ago - he's been in a nursing home ever since - can't really talk, and has no function on the left side of his body. I don't get to see him nearly as often as I should, but it rips my heart out a little each time I do. He was so strong. But he loves us to visit, and he smiles more than I ever remember him doing when I was a kid.

It was good to hang out with my sister, brother, sister-in-law, mom, dad and assorted relatives. We laughed A LOT over the weekend - mostly because my sister and I can be massively obnoxious. But funnny. So funny.

Do you ever feel like different parts of your life exist completely independent of one another? Like you bounce from one universe to the next as you move between them? I get that feeling a lot when I visit my home... some kind of strange, parallel universe. The weirdest part is that I grew up there.

rainy days

I'm Feeling: good-worn-out
Background Noise: Gilmore Girls on the TV

Check out Mark's miraculous dive from this weekend!!

Half day of work today, then went to the movies (saw Cars - very funny) with Christy, Huntar and Stephanie. I just love hanging out with those girls - can't believe they're going into 8th grade!!

I think the rain and gloom have sapped my energy today... thinking of hitting Beaner's this evening for a pick-me-up.

Ciao for now! More tomorrow.

scrub a dub

I'm Feeling: massively productive
Background Noise: Skid Row from Little Shop of Horrors Soundtrack

I still haven't found my camera cord, so no pictures from the pool yet...

Instead, feast your eyes upon cleaning products! That's pretty much what I did all last night - I gave both our bathrooms the most thorough cleaning they've had in ages - scrubbed floors, cleaned under the sink - the works. Awfully glamorous, let me tell you. I made 2 trips to Target and 1 to Meijer last night too.

Tonight's agenda: more cleaning (perhaps the kitchen this time), laundry, talking to the family on the phone... hold onto your hats, folks.

When Mark is away, I sure do know how to play. Seriously though - our house is one of those homes where it never looks dirty on the surface - but underneath, it's nowhere near as clean as I'd like it to be. So once in awhile, I try to scrub it down completely.

I went for a run last night and today, my knee hurts. Serves me right. Darn those healthy habits.

teaser

I'm Feeling: winsome
Background Noise: Jeopardy by Greg Kinh Band

As usual, Mark and I laid around, watched TV and slept in late this weekend... HA! Well, the sleeping in part is mostly true... but we definitely were not really sitting around doing nothing - what a fun weekend we had!

First - Friday, after AOP was over (10:30am), I hopped in a car with Mark, Cheryl, Dale, and Julie and headed up to Timberwolf Lake to visit for the day - we were having our Mason YoungLife and WyldLife Mission Community meeting up there. It's always fun to be at that camp - kids everywhere, lots of life and fun and noise, and James gave (as always) a really great talk. Got back around 1:30am after a really fun car ride back home.

Saturday - slept in til about 10:00 (which is super late for us) and decided to take 6 middle schoolers with us to the MSU pool to jump off various diving boards for 2 hours. It was awesome, especially since Saturday was HOT. Then we went to Coryell's house for fresh roasted pig - it's a little weird to see the teeth, nose, and tail of the animal you're about to eat... but man, did it taste good. (Here's the teaser part - I have awesome pictures and video of the trip to the pool, and pictures of the roasted pig... I just need to upload them - hopefully you'll see them tomorrow)

Sunday - went to church, then headed to Kawkawlin, MI (near Bay City) for a high school open house, then to Canton to have dinner with Mark's dad, sister, brother-in-law, and nephews. Home by nine, and we rounded out the night watching The Punisher - one of those Marvel comics movies that makes you want to laugh a little bit (and not because it's trying to be funny).
What was the best part of your weekend?

eclectic thoughts

I'm Feeling: a little bit ornery
Background Noise: Without You by Dixie Chicks

Not sure why this picture of a cow is on my computer. I was scanning my "My Pictures" folder, looking for something inspired to post today... and who can resist a photo file named "cow.jpg" - I ask you. Not I.

I had weird dreams last night. Not weird like "I was eating mud and wearing a banana suit while riding a unicycle." Weird like stressed out, high pressure, actual occurrences - work and personal related. I kept waking up, wondering what was making me dream such intense, gray-hair-inspiring things. I don't feel particularly stressed out at the moment, and I had a very relaxing night last night. Makes me think about how it's funny that we use the same word for the nocturnal movies that play in our brains as we use for our hopes, plans, and imaginings for our futures.

What kinds of things do you dream? If you could have anything, live anywhere, do anything, be anything... what would your life look like? Do you know specifics, or is there just a general sense of what things would be like?

i know you've thought about it...

1. Post a list of up to 20 books/movies/TV shows/videogames/etc. that you've had an obsessive fannish love of at some time in your life.
2. Have your friends guess your favorite character from each item.
3. Post in your own journal.

1. Gilmore Girls
2. Friends
3. Harry Potter
4. The Babysitter's Club series
5. The Lord of the Rings (books, not movies)
6. The Princess Bride
7. Wishbone
8. Veggie Tales
9. X Men
10. Dirty Dancing
11. A Few Good Men
12. Mad About You
13. Full House
14. East of Eden
15. Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood (book, not movie)

Okay, it's harder than I thought to come up with these... so fifteen is all you get. Clearly, many of my obsessions date back to childhood - I find I'm not as freakishly into things as I used to be. Any thoughts on whether that's good or not? :)

Give it a shot - what character did I like best from these books/movies/TV shows?

so simple

Did you know... the Andamanese language has words for only two numbers... one and more than one. Way to keep life simple, folks!

Academic Orientation Program (aka AOP) began at MSU today - I think it's fun to meet the incoming students - they're nervous, excited, tired, bored, ready to go, enthusiastic, grumpy - and everything in between. Mostly, they're really pumped to meet someone at MSU that wants to know them, laugh a little bit, and help them out.

I'm constantly humbled by how easy it actually is (most of the time) to help someone out, and make a real difference in his/her day. Guilt washes over me when students are so profoundly thankful for something that took minimal effort on my part. But what wasn't a big deal to me was absolutely huge in their world - I need to keep that in mind. Why is it that we don't jump on every opportunity that presents itself - when we know that so often, just caring about someone's problem can make all the difference?

LOVE your neighbor. It really can be that simple.

goin' places

I'm Feeling: frustrated and uncreative
Background Noise: Natural Anthem by The Postal Service

I just wrote a beautiful, delightful blog... and it didn't upload properly. The kicker is that it didn't come up with an error message - it just didn't work. And the window you type in disappears when you click "submit" so there's no way to go back, and cut and paste fabulously creative and inspiring words into a new blog. Big fat bummer.

Here's the gist - I'm totally stoked (yes, I just actually typed the word "stoked") to go to the U.S. Open (tennis) in September - my parents are taking us all (Meg, Adam, Melissa, Mark and me) as some kind of present to themselves - which is way cool. We have our hotel, our flights, and our tickets onto the grounds - it'll be awesome!! Mark, Meg, and I all played tennis in high school, and my dad is pretty good with a racket too - we all like watching tennis on TV (I know, tennis on TV = death for some of you). Maybe we'll get discovered for our raw athletic talent and start playing professional tennis. Weirder things have happened. I think.

I water-skied this weekend – let me tell you about my mad skills on the water. Not actual water-skiing skills… wipe-out skills. Now, I can’t watch myself, and I may be biased – but I crash harder and more spectacularly than anyone else out on the water. You’re not really skiing if you don’t get water in your lungs, the wind knocked out of you, big bluish-greenish bruises on your legs from spinning like a top across the water and sending your skis flying. And believe it or not – it’s totally fun. Granted, my body is not speaking to me today because of the pain it’s in – but it’s SO much more fun to ski than to try to ski (what I spent the past 4 summers doing).

Rounded out the weekend with a wild game of lava freeze tag at the park in Mason – we played for about an hour and were all heaving and sweating by the end. How do little kids play like that all day?

Fun weekend – lots of good people, got some sun, and now it’s back to the grind (stop laughing, I’ve actually been very productive today).

baby steps

I'm Feeling: ready for a nap and a weekend!
Background Noise: Trashin' the Camp by Phil Collins

Here's another photo collage from France - in color this time! You may notice - the skies were ridiculously blue the entire time I was there - supposedly, they get 300 days of sunshine each year in Montpellier. I can hardly imagine what that would be like...

Here's a tiny insight into Katie - On occasion, I can get myself a little stressed out about things - I have to fight my tendency to worry sometimes. However, I've noticed in the past few (days, weeks, months - I'm not really sure) - that tendency has been fading. God has really been working on my heart - that's not always a fun process (ok, really, it almost NEVER is) - but it's borderline startling to see what He can do.

The reason this came to mind today is that there are some situations/decisions (nothing major, really) in my life right now, that 2 years ago would have totally stressed me out. Today - I'm concerned, but mostly just interested in watching them unfold. I'm better at resting in the Lord's grace and perfect plan than I was yesterday. It's a cool thing to realize. I like this quote from the movie Life as a House - "Change can be so slow that you don't notice your life is better or worse, until it is."

Of course, now that I've publicly drawn attention to it, I am certainly due for some new, painful life lesson. : ) Bring it on!

Have a great weekend!!

good and faithful

Do you ever feel like it's totally unlikely that you could ever truly be used by the Lord to do amazing things?

I just started reading "Chasing Daylight" by Erwin McManus, and so far, it's really good - but it's also one of those books that makes me a little uncomfortable because it opens my eyes to how far I still have to grow. I love those kind of books (it's weird to love something that makes you uncomfortable, I know) - they always get me thinking.

The basic premise of the book is that we spend a lot of time waiting - not taking advantage of moments God gives us, watching life go by rather than living it - and often because we are afraid of making mistakes, of not walking in His will, or of not being good enough. This one hits a little too close to home for me.

I know it shortchanges God to think "He can't possibly use ME." He's GOD, right - He can do whatever He wants! It's cool to think that He planned it this way - to use vastly imperfect people to take part in extraordinary things in His name. I just want to get to the end and have God say "Well done, good and faithful servant." If I died today, I think He might say something more like, "Well, you were beginning to try to do what I wanted, well-intentioned and cautious servant." Not the same thing.

My goal is "Well done, good and faithful servant."

i heart summertime!

I'm Feeling: like dancing (not sure why)
Background Noise: Folsom Prison Blues by Joaquin Phoenix (Walk the Line)

The office is so much quieter in the summer. Not just the office, when it comes to that - but the whole campus. There are fewer people here, yes, but it's also a palpable change in energy. Everyone is a bit more mellow, a little less stressed, and a lot less Seasonal Affective Disorder-ish. It's nice. I prefer to be a little busier than I am right now, but it's good to know that life isn't always dragging you along as fast as you can run. Sometimes, I set the pace.

Today is a little gloomy/drizzly, but I still enjoy the summer-time so much... I like warmer weather, sunshine, flowers, kids playing outside, and the fact that we can take a walk pretty much every night if we want to. One thing that isn't so enchanting - I've started counting up some mosquito bites. They love to bite me, and my delicate-like-a-flower skin just puffs right up and gets all itchy. Maybe there is some kind of scare-mosquito (like a scarecrow) thing I could rig up outside my house. RAWR Mosquitos! Go away!

I know that the pic for today is one of the ones in the collage I posted yesterday - but it was such a pretty place. I walked by there basically every day I was in France - you had to walk up 102 steps to get there (and that was the only way to get downtown - makes for a good butt/legs workout).

Happy Wednesday!!

helter skelter

I'm Feeling: energized!
Background Noise: Reign in Me by Brenton Brown

Well, first off - here is a photo collage of some of the black and white pictures I took in France. The first one is a water tower in Montpellier, the second is on the Esplanade du Charles De Gaulle (a garden area in Montpellier), the next 5 (going across from left to right) are all of Carcassonne - the medeival walled city I visited, and the last 2 are from the restaurant in the country/mountains we ate at on Thursday (my last day in France). I saw some really beautiful stuff.

It's not even noon, and I feel like a lot has happened today already. I ate a delicious (if not spectacularly healthy) breakfast, courtesy of Coryell and Mark - and had great company - Mark, Al, Cory and I had a fun morning. Then at nine, I had an interview for an adviser position in the Psychology department - I think it went really well. I'm praying for God to make my path straight in terms of making these decisions, and I think if I don't get this job, it's because it's really not in His plan for me. There's no feeling of "why on earth did I say that?" or anything. I've seen 2 students, and am about to head to lunch with a friend in a little while.

It's a beautiful day - take advantage of the opportunities God is placing in your life today - even if it's just a trip to get an ice cream cone.

my new camera

I'm Feeling: back to normal
Background Noise: You're My Baby by Jonathan Rice (from Walk the Line)

I've jumped into the digital age just a little bit further - I now have my very own digital camera. And like all things electronic - it's just not quite as simple as you think it's gonna be. I had every intention of putting up a bunch of my France pictures today - but somehow, when I loaded the pics onto my laptop at home yesterday, they left my camera. So when I brought my camera to work to put them on my computer here... no dice. So rather than a dizzying array of breathtaking pictures of Southern France... here is a lovely shot of Comerica Park that I took a few weeks ago at the game. It puts me in mind of the baseball days of yore.

It's funny how quickly life goes back to normal when you come back from a big trip. The weekend was a little rough (jetlag bit me hard this time), but I feel good now. The office is normal, my emails and voicemails are waiting as always... same old. :) It's good to be back, though. It was nice to see my friends again this weekend - traveling by yourself makes you lonesome for people who know you well! 

leavin' on a jetplane

I'm Feeling: ready for a long journey home
Background Noise: computers humming (this lab really isn't as exciting as the iTunes in my office - but my head is playing Leaving on a JetPlane)

Well, it's just after 7am in France. My cab should be here in 20 minutes, to take me to the airport. I'm scheduled to arrive at the Lansing airport just before 9:30pm (which is 3:30am in France). If I keep telling myself I'm up for 20 hours of traveling - will it be true?

Honestly, I am up for it - it's been a fantastic trip - I've gotten to see some really cool stuff, and I have some great pictures... but this is not the way I'd normally want to travel. Jim (the faculty member from MSU in charge of the trip) and the girls have been great - but they don't really know me... It's hard to explain, but in some senses, it's been a really lonely trip. I wouldn't trade it though - I like being someplace different, and I've definitely gotten a slightly heightened sense of independence from this trip. I just don't think I'll become one of those gals who goes jet-setting off to exotic places all on her own... but I'll definitely not be afraid to take my own day trips around a new place.

Mostly, I miss the familiarity that home brings. There are people who know me, people who love me, daily interactions and tasks that make me feel like me. Mostly, I miss my other half - it really is weird to be without him for so long.

Bon Journee... hopefully my next post will have pictures for you all!!