Tuesday, February 10, 2009

it may be strange, but I love it

I had my 13-week appointment with my midwife today. (Sidenote: I pretty much love her. She works out of my doctors' office and is basically incredibly cool and friendly and really good at the whole bedside-manner thing. Something many of my doctors were NOT so good at).

I did the whole Step on the Scale, Pee in the Cup, Take the Blood Pressure, Any Questions? Thing and was waiting for Midwife to arrive to commence the actual appointment. I could hear through the wall what was going on in the next exam room... the voices were muffled, but there was no mistaking the sounds. The slow, rhythmic whoosh - whoosh - whoosh of the Doppler Thingymawhatsit, followed by rapid-fire whooshwhooshwhooshwhoosh of unborn baby's heart beating in its mama's belly.

And I just sat there, silently soaking in the beautiful sound of another woman's unborn baby's heartbeat.

I love that sound. Obviously, I love it a lot, and with a fairly personal reason when it's my own child... but there is such hope, such life in that joyful noise... it calms my spirit.

Now this morning, I did not get to hear my own child's heartbeat (Baby was a little too busy to be bothered with holding still for Midwife) - so I got a surprise treat and got to SEE Baby's heartbeat (and waving arms and kicky legs and perfect little face) instead.

And I've been floating on that all day.

It may be weird - but I love that office. I know that there are heartbreaking stories that unfold in those rooms (and I cried my own heartbroken tears there about two years ago now) - but that doesn't change for me the fact there is an undeniable and beautiful hope of life there. Pregnant women are constantly in and around the hallways - excited, nervous, exhausted - pictures of babies adorn the walls and the halls echo with the Doppler Thingymawhatsit's evidence of new life.

It's good for my soul.

3 thoughts:

Ashleigh Baker said...

Oh my word!! Oh my word!! I've fallen so far off the bloggity bandwagon that I didn't even see your preggie post!!!!! Scream! Squeal!! SO very thrilled for you!! Congrats! :D

(Wow--think that was enough exclamation points??)

Anonymous said...

Good grief...my own heart stopped when you said that you didn't get to hear your baby's heartbeat. So glad you got to see it on ultrasound. Glad the appt went well.

Julie said...

Ashleigh's comment made me giggle :) Did you watch Scrubs last night? I thought of you. (Geesh, I'm treating your blog like facebook. sorry!)

Anyway, I too love that heart beat sound. The tense moments when they can't find it and then the sudden thrill when you finally hear it. So exciting!

I'm so glad you got to 'see' Baby. So wonderful!

Here's an annoying questions... because I know how much you hate them :) Do you think you children will be the best of friends?