Wednesday, August 03, 2005
friendship day
I'm Feeling: ruminative
Background Noise: the beeping, creaking elevators - I haven't turned on iTunes yet
Today is Friendship Day... and I thought this picture was appropriate on multiple levels. First, and most obvious, it's a picture of the cast of Friends. Second - it looks like they are on a ship... friend-ship! Gosh I can really crack myself up.
I haven't really met anyone who didn't like having friends. I also haven't really met anyone who has perfected having/being a friend. Some people are great at attracting people to them, but are lacking when it comes to creating real, intimate relationships. Some people take wonderful care of the friends they have, but stink at making new ones. Some people have one or two close friends with awesome relationships, but then they get jealous/possessive of those friends. Some people have a ton of friends, a large network of people to be with, but don't have the time to keep in touch with all of them, and spread themselves too thin. Some people have a huge desire to be with others but their busy lives seem to keep them away. Others won't reach out and jump in, thinking they are more comfortable at home, but really have no idea of the fun they are missing out on.
I think pretty much all time, our perceptions regarding this area of our lives are skewed. Either we think our friend situation is fantastic, but really, there are people we love who are feeling ignored/neglected in some way... or we think we have no friends but really have no idea how many people out there are loving us. Both are destructive, I think. And everyone can slip either way, depending on the situation.
Thought for the day: What is your personal tendency in friendships? What are you good at/not so good at? How can we get better at these things, and help encourage those around us?
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2 thoughts:
I think I spread myself too thin! I think I don't have enough friends. I desire deeper friendships, I desire more friends. I think I'm everything wrong with disfunctional friendships. It's always a work in progress and unfortunately, forever changing. Friends come and go. I guess the really good ones just stick around longer. I think I'll write an unsuccessful book about "friendship" someday. Maybe this can be my intro... What do you think?
I think you definitely have enough friends, and I don't think you are everything wrong with dysfunctional friendships. I do think that a huge part of what makes this whole thing tricky is that you can't just learn how to be a good friend. You have to learn how to be a good friend to each individual friend that you have, and that looks different for each person. You really have to be a dedicated, loving, and willing student of those around you - which is fun, difficult, annoying, rewarding, joyful and boring all at once!!
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