Wednesday, August 20, 2008

a wee bit on the nervous side

I go to work today.
Meaning I get in my car, drive, park, get out and walk into the office and work.
My old office - the one I left in February to become a Stay at Home Mama. Today, I change my role to Work at Home Mama with the Occasional Visit to the Office. I'm on the books for 10 hours a week (primarily from this very computer in my very own home) from now until the end of April.
I'm excited about it - regular adult interaction, some semblance of continuity on my resume, and reclaiming a teensy bit of identity outside my home life.
But I'm also nervous about it. I don't really want to leave Hazel to go to work - even for a few hours, even with her loving daddy. She still doesn't take a bottle or sippy cup or any drink other than straight from the Mama Source... which makes me nervous for her and how she'll do while I'm gone. It's been over 6 months since I've been an adviser and (I know this is stupid, but...) what if I'm too out of practice to be very helpful? And (this one is almost too embarrassing/ashaming to admit) I'm nervous that my husband will stay at home with Hazel and have a great day and be better at it than I am and more patient than I am and wonder what the heck is so hard about staying at home.
Really - I know today will probably go well. It will be good to be out and to visit with Professional Katie - a gal I knew well for many years but haven't seen in months. But I'm not that same person anymore, and I'm intrigued/nervous to see how God blends the new aspects of my character into the old.
If you get a chance - say a quick prayer. Mostly for peace of mind.
And a bit for my hubby - that our precious girl would be good to him, even without the Mama Source.

3 thoughts:

Sarah Halter said...

How'd it go?

Tiffany said...

Oh how hard! I will be praying for all three of you. What a blessing for you to be able to have daddy there to spend time with his little girl while mommy is at work. It will all work out and adult interaction will be good! :) Let us know how your first day went!

Kaycee said...

Oh I am so there with you and thinking of you and hoping all goes well for you, Mark and Hazel! My first day back is Tuesday (with the full-time back and no more full-time Mama thing going on) so I know how you are feeling. I have not taught a lesson since April 2nd - no idea if I still know how to teach!

Hope it went REALLY well, especially without the Mama Source available to Hazel... :)